Brave
Putting on a brave face. Now there's something I'm good at.
I have a habit of not asking people to pray for me in difficult times. Why?
Shouldn't I crave the knowledge that close friends are interceding to God on my
behalf? Sure. But then there's the friends who remember and ask me how I'm
doing. That's the bad part for me. I can put on a brave face until someone
speaks to me. That's when I fall apart and become a hot mess.
A little over a year ago I asked friends to pray for a
situation I was facing. I happened to see one of those friends a couple of hours
later and she had the gall to ask me how I was doing. I couldn't say a word,
only cry. The next day I purposely avoided another one of those friends, but
she caught up with me anyway. She teasingly said, "Am I not good enough for
you today?" Yep, you guessed it. Hot mess right there in front of dozens
of people.
At another time another situation came up, and I again asked the same group of
friends to pray not giving any details about the situation. I was wiser
this time and told them I would be ignoring them so I could function. As long
as no one spoke to me with sympathy in their eyes, I could go through the
motions of each day – put on my brave face. A couple of weeks later the situation
had not changed. I at least was not constantly on the verge of tears. One
friend saw me, asked how I was doing, and hugged me when I began to choke up
(but only a little). Another friend saw me and gave me a hug without saying a
word. Another friend found me simply to give me something I needed. Another came
to the door of the room I was in and just stood there a waiting my attention.
Fortunately I saw her in my peripheral vision and purposely ignored her by
appearing to be busy talking to someone else. Later that day I sent her a
message letting her know I saw her and that her presence was enough. Her kind
words and hug would have been too much for me to bear. That brave face would've
been completely gone.
This world often throws things at us that make it hard to
be brave. We'd rather close our bedroom door, turn off all the lights, hide under
the covers, and pretend we don't exist. Putting on a brave face doesn't mean we
can't share personal prayer request with friends. It doesn't mean we can't break
down in front of them either. We are human beings, and sometimes the hurt we
have to deal with can be overwhelming.
There is One we don't have to pretend to be brave for, and
that is Jesus Christ. He already know what you're going through. He already knows
exactly how we feel. We can open up to Him and bear our is, souls, as ugly and
messy as that may look. It is God who gives me strength when I am weak. It is
God who helps us get up each morning and face each day.
If you are in the middle of the battle right now, it doesn't
matter whether it's physical, spiritual, or mental, stop pretending you have to
be brave. Reach out to godly friends. More importantly, reach out to God.
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